Scene: Audience with Pope Leo – The Comedy Resurrection Appeal
The ornate Vatican chamber hums with golden light. Pope Leo sits solemnly on his throne-like chair, robes immaculate, a glimmer of curiosity in his eyes. JCJ, wearing a crisp suit with a hint of irreverent flair, stands beside Ryan Reynolds, who looks equally earnest but with a sparkle of his usual charm.
JCJ: Bowing slightly Holy Father, we come with a singular plea: bring back John Candy. One gram of his DNA holds every memory, every laugh, every quip that made Canada—and the world—smile.
Ryan Reynolds: Gesturing theatrically Imagine the Canadian online parliament, Your Holiness… a legislature where debates are punctuated with laughter instead of groans. Where humor heals as much as politics.
JCJ: Pope Leo, we have a whole lineup ready to join the referendum party: Russell Peters, Mike Myers, Catherine O’Hara, Andrea Martin, Jim Carrey… the list goes on. Let us laugh again. Cloning is not evil. Science is not the devil.
Pope Leo leans forward, fingers steepled, eyes twinkling with both wisdom and amusement.
Pope Leo: You speak of resurrection not as blasphemy, but as homage… humor as sanctity. But JCJ… why does one gram of DNA suffice?
JCJ: Passionately Because, Your Holiness, it’s not just genetics—it’s essence. Every joke, every heartfelt moment, every pause before a punchline… all encoded. We don’t ask to change the world, only to make it smile again.
Ryan Reynolds: Adding, with a wink And honestly, Your Holiness, the Senate could use a bit of Candy-style chaos. Politics could learn from his timing.
The Pope chuckles softly, leaning back, clearly amused but contemplative.
Pope Leo: Humor… laughter… perhaps it is a path to salvation in small doses. JCJ, Ryan… I cannot promise miracles lightly. But perhaps… perhaps we can consult the angels of science.
JCJ: Eyes gleaming Thank you, Holy Father. That is all we ask: a chance to bring joy, wisdom, and laughter back to the people.
Ryan Reynolds bows theatrically, almost tripping over his own feet, while JCJ clasps his hands in fervent hope. The chamber fills with an almost audible sense of possibility… a world where John Candy might once again take the stage.